Monday, August 13, 2012

Oh Gosh. Pubic Hair.

I remember when I first started removing my pubic hair. It was when I was 18 and my sort-of-a-jerk (but I was totally in love with him) had asked me if I would try it. I remember being confused and not really understanding how I was supposed to go about removing it. He suggested trimming it and then shaving it, and asked me if I hadn't seen any porn before? And of course I had, and I had seen bare pussies. It was still the 90's, but some women were sporting the bare look back then. But I had never put 2 and 2 together and realized I could remove it myself.

I have no idea how long I spent in the bathroom, patiently trimming away hairs with my mom's cuticle scissors she had inherited from her mother, who had purchased them in Germany after World War II. At least at first, until it seemed like I wasn't making any headway and then cutting so close to the skin that I actually accidentally caught it a few times and cut into flesh. Then I hacked away at my wounded vulva until it was nearly a bloody pulp, for I was always condemned to disposable razors, my parents too cheap to want to buy me the nice ones in the commercials. When I finally gave up I was still left with an unusual pattern of stubble of varying lengths. I had almost entirely failed to get any of the hair along any of the many folds in my complicated female genitalia, and I had shaved the entire mound area down to an uncomfortable stubble that I could already see razor burn forming on. Sure that my parents would catch on after the hours I must have spent in the bathroom and the pubic hair now clogging the drain, I poured witch hazel over the entire mess and grimaced, feeling so raw in the area that I didn't think I could have sex for days. Yet I had done it so that I could impress my boyfriend that very night, and he actually liked it despite what a terrible job I had done.

After that, I kept it up for years. Improving my technique and even getting good enough to shave my asshole without too many nicks. I kept a fairly fully patch on my mound since I never did figure out how to avoid razor burn over that very sensitive skin, only cleaning up the edges along the lines where my leg met my torso. I don't have any that grows up my stomach nor does it stretch very far down my thighs, so my main focus was always just my vulva, beginning where my lips meet just about my clit and stretching back to my ass. It never really got easy, but I had a ritual of removal that worked for me. I loved the way it felt the day of and the day after I shaved; bare skin in that area is incredibly sensitive to touch. But as soon as the hair started to grow in it would become itchy and uncomfortable. And I need to wait at least a week to shave again- otherwise I would get too many nicks and ingrown hairs and razor burn.

Why, you may ask, did I continue to go to such trouble if all I got was a day or 2 of nice feelings maybe once every 1 to 2 weeks? For the approval of boys? Well, after that first boyfriend, I never actually found another guy who seemed to care. I have found that most guys, if anything, prefer a trimmed bush. And by that I mean all the hairs intact and just kept short- not the look I was sporting with hair up top. Of the few who don't prefer trimmed, most will tell you they like a full bush and few will tell you they actually prefer partially shaved or bare. Are they just saying that because they know that's what women want to hear? I don't think so. I myself am satisfied with their answers, and after that first boyfriend I definitely didn't keep doing it for them. And don't even ask me about women here- I didn't start having sex with female folk until later.

Looking back, it feels ridiculous to admit it was simply social pressure. I love porn, so don't get me wrong here, but it definitely kept me in the mindset of thinking bare was the only choice I had as a woman. I wanted to be considered desirable; not by the men who I shared my sexuality with, oddly enough, but I wanted to be considered desirable by societal expectations. On the off chance that people who weren't my boyfriend might actually see my lovely vagina, I wanted them to be able to really see it. And I wanted them to see it as the most desirable kind of vagina in America, the shaved bare porny little tight lipped pussy like the ones in porn. And that was just what I had. Who were the they who might see my pussy randomly? I have no idea. I certainly wanted to be a porn star back then, but I wasn't about to go through with it at that point.

I have no doubt that pubic hair removal is perfectly painless and fine feeling for most people. A lot of people have told me to try waxing, but the last time I had my eyebrows waxed I had broken out in a rash in allergic reaction or just absolute skin rage that it had been violated so. I wasn't about to go that route. And every time I shaved, the more the skin on my beloved vulva rebelled. I'm not surprised to have read more about it recently, and found that for a lot of people removing pubic hair can increase bacterial infections of both the skin and the genitals. Both of which I experienced at times during my pubic hair removal periods.

So I got pretty secure in my relationships, and pretty secure in my sexuality, and just so sick of dealing with all this time and heartache in hair removal. So I stopped shaving, but kept it short. Eventually I grew my leg hair and armpit hair out over the winter, and grew the pubes out all the way too. I found I really liked having armpit hair but not so much leg hair. So now I shave my leg and armpit hair (cuz I could take it or leave it), sometimes I trim my pubes and sometimes I let them grow all the way out again.

I may try removing it again, but honestly I don't see the big deal. It's such a big hassle for so little reward! Seriously people.

1 comment:

  1. Kitten, My personal view on pubs v. shaved is that a woman with a full bush is naturally sexy and alluring. So for the love of all things feminine and beautiful and sexy, please don't shave your bush.
    Thank you,